I didn't change too much from the original form of this poem, just some cosmetic touches here and there. I really like what is says, and the way it says it. I also hid a secret message within the poem, so I had very little leeway in changing the words too much. I am re-working my elegy and I will be posting that later.
Verdadero is the Spanish word for true. Aqui means here.
Verdadero
Digits and data are waltzing thru space,
Aligning themselves into something wise.
Void of emotion; I can't see your face.
I would say more if you could read my eyes.
Desire, elusive-things I can't know,
Conversation becomes our way to dance.
Honesty isn't a thing I can show,
And until later, there won't be a chance.
Rhetoric: with words-we spar-we flirt, we
Dodge around what is unbidden to say.
Astounding, the emotion in QWERTY
When it is simply the light of my day.
Aqui, I am. The truth is stronger stuff.
Yearning. And longing. For now, is enough.
This is very nice. I especially like the idea in the one line: "Conversation becomes our way to dance", and the way in which you describe it is very clever. I can see your dilemma though--changing the words to make it truly iambic. I would still play around with it a bit to see if you can make it work (I'm sure an adept writer like yourself could, though it may not be worth the all the trouble), but if not, this is still an excellent poem and it follows the sonnet's form in content and theme (though not in meter).
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